mimicking trains by whistling from trees

1st of tha month

ishootlightning@yahoo.com — Wed, 01 Jul 2009 15:32:25 GMT

ishootlightning@yahoo.com — Tue, 14 Apr 2009 04:35:12 GMT

my father has been excercising this extreme sexual power with me and my daughter. i can't put my finger on it.

screennameofdeath: sup dog

josh tangle: sup dad

we gotta mesh better this time

my daughter started to gain weight latter on in life

MORE MUSIC I LIKE

ishootlightning@yahoo.com — Sun, 12 Apr 2009 18:31:37 GMT

BOY DIRT CAR

Real Names: Dan Kubinski, Darren Brown, Eric Lunde, Keith Brammer
Profile: BDC were formed by Darren Brown and Eric Lunde in 1981 after the two young punkers met Glenn Branca at a Chicago noise-music festival. Gathering a few friends together for jams, they proceeded to play with a revolving-door line-up that usually consisted of Brown, Lunde and any drunken and/or drug-addled buddy they could string along. Finally settling on a semi-stable line-up that consisted of the duo and Keith Brammer and Dan Kubinski of Die Kreuzen on various metal percussive instruments and noise-making devices, BDC found their feet and were soon hailed by well-meaning folks as America's answer to Einstürzende Neubauten. Inactive as a band for many years, Eric Lunde in the meantime released some solo records and Darren Brown formed Impact Test.

I looked for the "winter" lp but couldn't find it online. i still don't know how to rip records to computer to i guess you will have to deal with their side of the F/i split LP.

track listing (the songs are all on one track.)

BOY DIRT CAR "split with F/i material" rrr records 1986

1. metal house
2. friction moves
3. he tore out his eyes
4. impact test
5. harm

i recommend everyone going out and getting "winter". you can find it pretty cheap online.

more material by american power electronic / early industrial artists to be posted.

my other blog / label

http://www.breathingproblemproductions.blogspot.com

PERSONAL SHIT

ishootlightning@yahoo.com — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 08:50:29 GMT

HOW OLD WERE YOU WHEN YOU WUZ FIRST HIT ON

14

WHAT DID YOU SAY

I WAS SCARED AT FIRST

DID YOU CRY

no

did you want to run away?

i did

why didn't you?

because i was scared

so why didnt you scream or ask for help?

because i was frightened

you should have done something to notify an adult they can protect you

i know

it was a mistake to not run away from him

FUCKING IDIOT

PISSED

ishootlightning@yahoo.com — Mon, 30 Mar 2009 17:01:17 GMT

near the end of my deep fantasy about jason he is taking off his mask and i see his eyes are nothing but white or off white. i am deeply scarred emotionally but physically i am alright. my next step is to talk to him to try and understand him.

SXSW ENDS HORRIBLY

ishootlightning@yahoo.com — Fri, 27 Mar 2009 08:11:50 GMT

photos taken, scanned and dealt with by mikaylah bowman

MARCH 17th 2009

it's tuesday the 17th and i pick matthew lyons from the hell style airport. the jetblue nyc flight delivers 1,000 disgusting freaks and i am shocked at all the floppy cowboy hats and unshaved baby faces that appear outside the port.

i pick up matt and we then pick up duncan at 11ish. less humans exist.

we all pick up our pointless wristbands and proceed to "miss beas" where we play a horrible show at like 5pm to about 11 humans. the set is weird and off. we quickly leave and go eat at thai kitchen. i bow to too many waiters and we show up to the "new guild" hippie commune to play a house show.

duncan has sea hag hair

duncan has sea witch hair

our set is the best of sxsw and not enough freaks got to hear it even though the room was packed with small piglet babes. i try to blast out noise but it works slightly.

everyone is bored beyond fiction or fact

later at that same party cult ritual dogs show up and tommy places his penis so it stands straight up. it was shocking and sexy.

the vivian girls cover wavves at least 3 times and i can't stop twittering

matt lifts royce

later that night i freak out and get wendys with mikaylah. natalie comes with us and later nothing of interest occurs so she takes a cab and matt lyons stops by for one millisecky.

i fall asleep to friends episodes. i'm on season 2.

MARCH 18th 2009

i awake early and pick up homefreak jeff witscher. i had never met this guy before but upon scooping him he turned out to be one of the nicest freaks i have ever met. good dude. we crawl back to the crib and so begins my day of nothing but hell stress.

a day full of trying to grab the worst drum kitss and spending 60 dollars on weird drum kit extras. duncan and s.e. will buy a schlotskeez sandwitch and then we gett to 1808 just as everyone starts to freak and cry tears of pure rage.

white dog plays an d i am beyond happy with the outcome. no one likes it because we are trying too hard to be weird and i can't play inept noise drums all that well.

secret abuse blasting

secret abuse bursts mikaylah's ear into pure liquid blood. mikaylah's ear bleeds for days.

cult ritual

total abuse accident

gun outfit is the best sxsw band and everything ends stress free. i fall asleep watching friends. i'm a mix of chandler and rachel.

MARCH 19th 2009

the day begins free of all stresses and we travel to a general taco slop shop to eat. good stuff. pretty good.

free of stress?

we all decide to swim and burn:

MAN

WOMAN

we get kicked out for drinking glass milk bottles and then sadly drizzle down to red 7 to play a weird show. i sit outside red 7 with mikaylah and freak out at the insane sights. too much for heart or mind to witness. shock shit.

gears

ryan fos

we all play and then matt and mikaylah and i fall asleep for hours.

we wake up and go to ballet austin. millions of 6th grade babies with headsets are controlling the show mommy gave them. tons of powerful annoying geeks running around. we let coconuts play with half our set then we slowly come on.

duncan is in mental hell and begins mentally controlling himself.

unstable ideas

no damages

i try to break a big plate glass window with the mic stand but the mic cord isn't long enough. true sadness.

we play mutt and i stand up on some thing and act strangely theatrical.

plays

some are bummed and one kvrx cry baby tries to yell at me so he gets slightly kicked by me

i jump down like a true pussy and run out the door just as all our amps get shut off. i just sit around and wait. we leave fast. i watch friends and notice some things i like about ross.

MARCH 20th 2009

stress free morning. we meet up with jeff and cult ritual freaks. we spend all day sitting on the front porch and watching tommy's dick stand on end and also talk enough shit to last the day.

hours later we go to 1808.

cult ritual

total abuse

i get so drunk i almost write a good review of the newest wavves lick but end up just eating gallons of meat. charlie argues with brace for years and wins. i noticed charlie has normal glasses in comparison to brace's giants.

jeff mikaylah and i go home and i watch more friends than most. everyone parties on the bridge but i am a pussy...

duncan apparently goes up to some kid with a small pony tail:

duncan: hey your pony tail makes you look like a pansy

pone kid: what?

duncan: i said your pony tail makes you look like a bitch

pone: arent you duncan knappen?

duncan: huh?

pone: i saw you in a skate video arent you duncan?

duncan: don't ever say my fucking name again. don't fucking look at me.

true comedy jams

end of true sxsw activity

days later spent watching too much tv and other people yelling at humans. someone goes to the vice party and possibly does cocaine. i am unaware of life or parties. just friends occurs.

end sxsw forever

FREAKING OUT

ishootlightning@yahoo.com — Fri, 27 Mar 2009 05:17:46 GMT

i heard my small sweet brother jane flyer is running for class prez. she once told me he was "fed up" with the current reading list which consisted of the book "advil for children" and "elixir for adults". it was a joke list but jane couldn't stop reading about different drugs.

she later got a job near a doggy daycare and this is a nightmare she described. the above photos are from a camping trip to the woods

for all the freaks

ishootlightning@yahoo.com — Fri, 27 Mar 2009 03:32:15 GMT

MY DENT DAY

ishootlightning@yahoo.com — Wed, 11 Mar 2009 21:42:01 GMT

day one of my intense sexual surgery. my father pilsner is upset that my teeth are less weed and too much tooth. so he had my surgical team change my teeth into buds.

this is a interior breast shot of my baby brother josh.

in this exact moment i am beyond the outer plane and inside the interiror breast plate i mentioned before. my doctor selena is trying to forgive me at this exact moment.

an exact drawing of my first stiffy in front of my mom

me realizing i am a moluecule inside a germ within an atom of cells. i gave my 4 year old self LSD and started to freak when my daughter gave me this fucking mirror. inside self exploration sexually .

the day after surgery after i realized my dcotor stopped me period from sludging out.

peace mon

MY FAVORITE RECORDS #1

ishootlightning@yahoo.com — Sun, 08 Mar 2009 21:36:21 GMT

SUTCLIFFE JUGEND - WHEN PORNOGRAPHY IS NO LONGER ENOUGH
1. When Pornography Is No Longer Enough (2:04)
2. First Victim: With Knife: Left To Die With Many Cuts (4:20)
3. Second Victim: With Brutal Force: My Pleasure Your Pain (3:06)
4. Third Victim: With Control: Message To Your Mother (5:50)
5. Fourth Victim: With Murderous Passion: Homage To De Sade (4:30)
6. Fifth Victim: With Murderous Passion: Homage To De Sade (3:38)
7. Sixth Victim: With Venomous Contempt: F.B.C. (4:20)
8. Seventh Victim: With A Beauty Beyond Compare: Slow Torture (6:13)

sutcliffe jugend's 5th official album. released in 1998 on death factory. SJ were already known for their raw and primitive version of PE. Using mics and a guitar instead of the usual layered synths creating albums which walked the line between harsh noise and power electronics. This time around on "When pornography is no longer enough" they utilized multiple loops and cut ups along with the usual maniac vocals by kevin tomkins to create one the most violent and harsh power electronics albums ever. this is it. one of the best. sutcliffe jugend never lets up. better than anything whitehouse ever did.

"when pornograghy is no longer enough"
"when fantasy is no longer is enough"
"when restraint is no longer enough"

DOWNLOAD HERE

ishootlightning@yahoo.com — Fri, 06 Mar 2009 01:20:38 GMT

"Christopher B and Robyn F have been involved in a dating relations for approx 1 and half year. On Sunday Feb 8 at 25 hours Brown was driving a vehicle with Robyn F as the front passenger on an unknown street in Los Angeles. Robin F picked brown,s cellular phone and picked up a three-page text message from a woman Brown had had a previous relationship with.

"A verbal argument ensued and Brown pulled a vehicle over in an unknown street. Reach over Robyn F with his right hand and open the car door and attempted to force her out. Brown was unable to force Robyn F out of the vehicle because she was wearing a seat belt. When he could not force her to exit he took his right hand and shoved her head against the passenger window of the vehcile causing an approx 1 inch raised circular contusion.

"Robyn F turned to face Brown and punched her in the left eye with right hand. He then drove away in the vehicle and continued to punch her in the face with his right hand while steering the vehicle with his left hand. The assault caused Robyn F Osmouth to fill with blood and blood to splatter all over her clothing and the interior of the vehicle. Brown looked at Robyn F and stated "I am going to beat the s–t out of you when we get home! You wait and see!?

"Robyn F picked her cellular phone and called her personal assistant Jennifer Rosales. Rosales did not answer the telephone but while her vm greeting was playing Robyn F pretended to talk to her and stated "I am on my way home. Make sure the cops are there when I get there? (this statement was made while greeting was playing and was not captured) after Robyn f faked the call, Brown and looked at her and stated, 'You just did the stupidest thing ever! Now I really am going to kill you.'

"Brown resumed punching Robyn F and she interlocked her fingers behind her head and brought her elbows forward to protect her face. She then bent over at the waist placing her elbows and face near her lap and in attempt to protect her face and head from the barrage of punches being levied by Brown. Brown continued to punch Robyn F on her left arm and hands, causing her to suffer a contusion on her left triceps that was approx 2 inches in diameter and numerous contusions on her left hand. Robyn f attempted to send another text message to other personal assistant Melissa Ford. Brown snatched the cellular telephone out of her hand and threw it out of the window to an unknown street. Brown continued driving and Robyn F observed his cellular phone in his lap. She picked up the cellular phone with her left hand, and before she could make a call, he placed her in a head lock with right hand and continued to drive the vehicle with his left hand.

"Brown held Robyn F close to him and bit her on her left hear. She was able to feel the vehicle swerving from right to left as Brown sped away. He stopped the vehicle in front of [address] and Robyn F turned off the car removed the key from inignition and sat on it. Brown did not know what she did with the key and began punching her in the face and arms. Brown began applying pressure to Robyn F left and right carotid arteries causing her to be unable to breath. She began to lose consciousness. She reached up with her left hand and began to attempting to gauge his eyes in attempt to flee herself. Brown bit her left ring and middle fingers and released her. While brown continued to punch her she turned around a place her back to against the passenger door. She brought her knees to her chest and placed her feet against Brown,s body and began pushing him away.

"Brown continued to punch her on legs and feet causing several contusions. Robyn F began screaming for help. And Brown exited the vehicle and walked away. A resident in the neighbor heard Robyn F,s plea for help and called 911, causing a police response. An investigation was conducted and Robyn F was issued a domestic violence protective order (EPO). Affiant conducted an interview with Melissa Ford who advised on Feb. 8 2009 at 2500 hours she received a phone call from Robin F from an unknown telephone number later identified as the telephone number of Officer Chavez. Robin F had advised Ford that she had been assaulted by Brown. At approx at 1 am Brown called Ford as nothing happened. Ford advised Brown that she had already talked to Robin F and was aware of what happened. Ford had advised brown that the neighbors had called police and that they were with Robyn F. Brown had asked Ford if robin F had provided police with his name. And ford advised him that she had. Brown hung up the telephone and did not call back.

"On Feb. 8, Brown turned himself in and was given a copy of the EPO and advised to not contact Robyn.

"On Feb. 17 Ford advised the affiant that she had received text messages from … a number that Ford recognized as belonging to Brown. In the text message Brown apologized for what he had done to Robin F. and advised Ford he was going to get help."

ishootlightning@yahoo.com — Wed, 04 Mar 2009 21:32:54 GMT

twitters for this day

xrusterx
08:53 my dad has been cheating on his lifestyle tests again... #
10:59 @joshnincom WHATEVER my brother trish has been driving atvs since birth. and paintballing for months now. #
10:59 @Tylerroberts stop asking me for notes #
11:00 trying to figure out if scrabble is a video game or a computer game. #
11:45 working out with my mom and her sisters amy. #
13:35 i hope i can win a new daughter in the daughter contest this month. #
16:18 trying to buy new salsa but can't figure out what is the most healthy #
16:52 Wow my dad is still trying to buy me a new doctor's office #
18:01 www.mynewbaby.com #
20:53 i found out it's over 100 dollars to go on a trip to seatlle! there goes my latest plans...#
20:56 @hildy i need to remember how to make candy again. remind me to pick up my boiler. #
21:12 someone send me a new password to myvegout.com #
21:23 does anyone know if i can play guitar or not? i need to know. #
22:09 i remember when i lived in a dorm and had to finger my dorm room just to make it shut up #
22:38 my dad keeps talking to me. #
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TOTAL ABUSE + FAILURES

ishootlightning@yahoo.com — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 07:02:44 GMT

left from right; ryan foster, dustin pilkington, matt lyons, duncan knappen, rusty kelley (total abuse)

FEBRUARY 12th 2009

fuck you bitch. members of the tour are charlie willhoit, dustin pilkington, ryan foster, matt lyons, rusty kelley and mikaylah bowman. we leave new york and follow the gps at all times. the gps leads us into the worst traffic i have ever experienced in my entire fucking life. i think traveled 2.5 miles in about 3 hours. no joke. i started to go nuts but started to calm down slightly.
we got to new haven connecticut and played a house show in a house that smelled like true body odor. certain beings inside the house were selling diy anarchist gardening faq zines as well as 25 similar booklets. the beings were the ones smelling this house up.

we played and it was supposedly our best. i don't remember.

matt lyons has the largest "thin shirt" collection

- hours later

hour later we drove to middletown connecticut and played in a dark dungeon known as a university campus. we played and i think it existed in time. mark mccoy (failures) kicked a fat crusty girl in the stomach and i laughed hard. he also ripped her orange beanie off the top of her head and threw it and i laughed again.

failures 1

failures 2

later that night we ate some cart food and bought weed from a nice guy. that night we got high and argued about proper mla guidelines and whether or not weed smoke is addictive. people got very up and arms about this second idea. then we listened to specific r&b hits from the 90s and above.

slept and then woke up

FEBRUARY 13th 2009

we drove to boston tx in a hurry. the drive is a blank and almost certainly forgotten and gone. we get there and eat at some spot called "grasspopper". this place is filled with slobbery tofu glop. i drink 2.5 cokes. tofu glop is uneaten. the whether is so cold i want to kill myself. we walk to some stores in the cold and buy packs of nails and a coffee can. we get to the show that exists in another campus dungeon.

matt lyons preforms his circular breathing techniques

failures plays their set and mark crushes a light bulb. i laugh again. you had to be there.

total abuse plays and for the first time the noise is actually loud enough. the audience holds their ears and seems to hate it. thank god. it's working.

nails + can + contact mic

when we play mutt i touch mikaylah in all the wrong ways. i hope someone thinks it's "weird".

big head

i am writing in a jewish law book. don't worry it's just a joke.

we drive to new york that night. get in at 530. ryan foster starts drinking + more when we walk in on the early am party. non stop foster. i am proud, but too tired.

goodnight

FEBRUARY 14th 2009

new york city show is first at the cakeshop. salvation plays and although i am talking to someone ( i thought salvation had opened) i see the lead singer walk past me covered in blood.
here is some blood shit:

ryan foster holds a bloody salvation set list

glass and blood

coke lighting

bar vibes

duncan + patrick

we meet our friends, failures continues after salvation bleeds and then we play a set of songs.

more coke lighting

rusty + jeremy + garret

shaun dean does guest vocals on mutt

later that night after ryan drinks too much we play a show at 548 johnson ave. it is filled with the worst pc bike punk pussy babes ever. terrible idiots. couldn't deal with it. ryan foster is so drunk he can't play guitar and reverts to his drunk state. we get threw a couple songs ( i almost quit every after every song) and then ryan jumps into the crowd and aimlessly throws some punches at the little cry baby dogs. some freak tries to drag ryan out the room (notice the word drag instead of fight (obviously pc pussy babes don't fight)) but mark mccoy sits ryan down and gives him a hug and chills foster the fuck out. thank you mark. he needed some kindness that night.

duncan's hair

the night ends with duncan and matt going to a party that starts at 4 am and then going to sleep at 8 ish. then waking up at 12ish.

FEBRUARY 15th 2009

we wake up feeling sore and sick. everyone has a cold or a flu. mucinex is passed around. advil is passed around. people go eat pizza. we drive to philly and play feeling sore and tired. the vibes are dark and cold. i'm glad. "into it". someone throws eggs at the venue. the club owner seems to know who threw the eggs. the venue is forever shrouded in mystery. cool.

mikaylah sleeps in the van and unknowingly bites her bottom lip apart. she awakes...

we get back to new york and check into a hotel.

sleeping together

the night ends with various cable tv shows and foods

we all leave and fly home at different times the next day. end of trip.

more pictures

ishootlightning@yahoo.com — Wed, 04 Feb 2009 22:22:30 GMT

pictures

ishootlightning@yahoo.com — Wed, 04 Feb 2009 22:15:10 GMT

collaboration between myself and mikaylah bowman

ishootlightning@yahoo.com — Thu, 15 Jan 2009 05:14:23 GMT

yoda and friends

why didn't this show exist? yoda is cool / cuddly. i've never seen star wars but he seems like the green oscar the grouch.

problems

ishootlightning@yahoo.com — Wed, 14 Jan 2009 20:01:35 GMT

SCOTT MOFFATT

ishootlightning@yahoo.com — Mon, 05 Jan 2009 04:33:54 GMT

watch this entire thing. it is worth it.

PARTY POST

ishootlightning@yahoo.com — Tue, 23 Dec 2008 23:53:46 GMT

last nite was my daughter fawn's bachorloteet parrtie. im personally still hungover from all the boozer and schloozer. wet as a whistle and near dead from the distle.

the night started out boring:

abunch of bitchy 2o soemethings out for a night of drinking. (i'm the one taking the pic)

and they all stole my best heels. i had to wear two pounds of make up to cover the bloating i reiceved from the sunburn i recieved boating last week. (my husband fucked me that morning and i got burned in more ways than 1)

finally we got to scout's watering h-le.

:

here is a pik of my daught too

she is TOTALLY fucked to be brime from drinking and shots of vodka / rum. totally out cold. i had to take the girl all around town while she puked and paraded her ass down mainstreet and shit. we even tried to get freestyle rap tattoos (mine was going to be a 90s freestyle by mac brown) but then alana puked up a pound puppy she swalloed earlier.

so after all the bullshit she sobered up a bit and we went to the concert to meet josh:

josh is alana
's cousin and confidant and they have a great realtationship.

josh gave her some xaanx to come down from the booze and we went to chools bar and pool hall

finally i showed her some wedding pictures from my wed:

that is a piocture of her doctor (dr. mil) trying to poop in his diaper. he has to crouch because of a gastrointestinal problemo and that is me trying to pray for peace.

i also showed her a pic of the time she met michael that fucking pedophile i bet he has a boner while he was smooching on her threads of her hair (it was a wig / toupee):

also her first trophy for winning a spelling bee:

she was the first baby to spell hockey in our town

whyy

ishootlightning@yahoo.com — Tue, 16 Dec 2008 10:14:43 GMT

trueevil.com

evillittlething.com

theevilistbaby.com

evileyes.com

myevilrapper.com

littlerappingdemon.com

theevilestrapper.com

rapwithdemonpossesors.com

littlegoblinevil.com

goblintheweirdo.com

livingevilwithmymomma.com

evilshit.org

HI DEF

ishootlightning@yahoo.com — Wed, 10 Dec 2008 06:08:25 GMT

THINGS TO DO ON SATURDAY

ishootlightning@yahoo.com — Wed, 10 Dec 2008 04:13:56 GMT

I'VE BEEN REALLY INTO KAT + BaBY VIDEOS

ishootlightning@yahoo.com — Sun, 30 Nov 2008 21:45:35 GMT

here are a couple of my favorite kat + bAby videos (or really videos with bAbies partially abusing or grabbing kats)

HOW MUCH CAN 1 KAT TAKE?!:

BaBY DAVID AND HIS KAT:

BaBY NERD HARASSING THE KAT (NO SOUND):

BaBY AND HIS KAT:

IF YOU WANT TO CONTRIBUTE ANY KAT VS BaBY VIDS REMEMBER THAT THE BABY MUST BE THE ABUSER / GRABBER. THE KAT CANNOT BE WINNING.

THANKS

MONDAY MORNING BLOODS

ishootlightning@yahoo.com — Tue, 25 Nov 2008 07:22:24 GMT

RECENT LETTER FROM MOM

ishootlightning@yahoo.com — Sun, 09 Nov 2008 20:46:26 GMT

dear son

lenny and i have been thinking about collage and we think you should quit. it's a burden on both of us and you. we can't buy a car and you can't buy the beer you always dreamt of drinking in college. what is collage with out good times? lenny and i think you should quit and then use some of the extra money from selling books (hopefilly it isn't too late in the semester) to buy some dream beer or wine. lenny thinks korbel champain is the best for celebration (just a side note to all this thinks) .

lenny and i on the other hand are burdened as fuck by having to give all your collage fund to this school of yours. your dead father may have given you a collage fund but i think he had no clue how it would make me and lenny wish we had the money that was going to you.

we see thousands of pounds (dollars) go to some bullshit school and then you dont have the beer you want an dlenny an di don't have the dreams of boats or water or arbua. i think if you quit its the best for us. your father would have wanted something similar to this plan pre death i think.

think it over

drink a beer in your head

first ones on me (lenny too!)

love

mom

ps

here are some pictures you might like (put em on your dorm book or something!)

lenny at disney world entrance:

your father and you:

your father and you praying (?) (i wasnt there):